Also, just so you know, the doctors are right. Every fill hurts more each time I have to do this fill thing. If I had known that there was this much pain involved, I don't think I would have gone through reconstruction. Only two more fills to go. I can do this. It is worth it. My mantra for today, because I'm pretty sure this pain is going to kill me. It's hard to breathe. I can barely move. I can't raise my arms to brush my hair so I look like a very pale witch. Yay. . . not.
OK enough about that. I want to share the blessings that I have experienced over the last couple of weeks since I last wrote. My doctor took me off work for a few weeks, because my white blood cell counts are so low. I know that doesn't sound like a blessing, but I really needed some down time to get healthy. I've been doing research with my down time and have decided that I do not want to take the cancer meds. Tamoxifen is severely hampering my quality of life. Since every step of treatment is an extremely personal decision, I have made the decision to discontinue my hormone blocker. I am looking forward to getting my energy back and feeling happy again.
I have been making art. This is my meditation, and it heals my soul.